Respect

A few days ago as I was watching the Dr. Phil show, Steve Harvey, the comedian was on the show talking about his new book, Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man. During the show he gave great advice to woman about how men think an why they do what they do. After the show I knew that i needed that book. So yesterday I went to Barnes an Nobel an purchased his book. Not knowing what to expect I put of starting the book until about 2:30am. As soon as I began reading I was hooked. Getting advice from a man about how men act an why they act the way they do an how to get the man you want an keep him, this book was like gold. I stayed up reading this book til 4:30am when my eyes just could stay open anymore. I was learning as I went through the book an the one section that inspired me to write this blog was the section titled, Over Love isnt like your Love. As Steve lays out in the book men need few things. But the things that they do need are very important an essential to their happiness an well being. He starts of by saying that to find a good man an to keep him a man must first establish himself. They must know who they are, have established what they do, an know how much they make or atleast on the track to get there. He explains that men are in a competition with other men everywhere to be the best of them all. Making the money that want, having the job that they want, an knowing where they are going in life. In this chapter, Steve explain what men need to love. Men are big on their egos. Men need to be treated or at least think are your king. Men are protectors an will do anything in their power to make sure that the woman that they love has everything that she needs, is protected, an has all of her basic needs met. He also mentions that a man should respect a lady. He mentions how men think about woman like a fisherman thinks about fishing. A fisherman will either keep a fish that he catches or he will throw it back if it is not the perfect fish that he is looking for. Same for men. If a man is talking to a girl an she has an attitude or makes him feel worthless then she is a throw back. But when a woman has respect for herself an is independent she is a possible keeper. Another thing I learned was that when a guy really likes you he will take you an introduce you to his family an friends. If a guy gives a title to the girl he is with other than your name an friend then you are a possible keeper. Once he gives you a title he is announcing to the whole world that he claims you an you are his. Now a man once you are his an even before that, he should treat u a certain way. He should show you that he really wants you. The trick is that u have to lay out for him what u want from the start. Men need a blueprint to what makes you happy. But you dont exactly say i want this, I dont want that, an I cant tolerate this. You have to disguise what you want with sweet talk. A man will treat you any ole kinda a way when he doesnt know the rules you are wanting to play by. He also lays out that a man when he comes up to you wants to know how fast it will be for him to be able to get in bed with you. He will decide if you are worth the trouble an the effort to try an be in a relationship with you. Once you lay out what it will take for a guy to get with you an he agrees to abide by those rules then you must hold him to it. If you want him to call you you, make sure you tell him that when you are interested in getting to know a guy, you want to talk to him a few times a week to get to know him better. If you want him to be on time, tell him that time is precious an who like it when ppl are on time an if they are not going to be on time that they show you the common courteously to call an tell me that they are going to be late.

Anyway what I took from this book is that I need to have more standards an expect more from men. I have to lay out to them, ask them questions, an show them what I am expecting in a man an let them decide if im worth it. From now on i will not be man chasing an trying to find a boyfriend. I will wait an let that right man come along who is right for me. I will not let men treat me just any old way because I am worth more than that an so i will show them that. Anyway this is what my new revelation that I will be living by in 2010. So men be ware, a new me is on the loose an im not tryna play games. So if you are willing to work, then ill be here waiting!